|Deviant Login||Shop||Join deviantART for FREE||Take the Tour|
MusicWords can't begin to capture my feelings on music.
People laugh when I sing along in my soft, high voice a little out of tune. I laugh too, when I would normally want to cry, because the melody compels me.
With fast beating notes surrounding me, their familiar melody as comfortable as my favorite sweater, and boosting my confidence like my prettiest dress, I smile at the world. I feel like I could take on anything.
It's not necessary to be the best – not when my passion could trumph a thousand pop stars.
Even work – boring, slow, tedious work – is actually fun when I hear my song in the background. I don't think I'm very good at any social grace, but my smile is contagious with a harmony on my lips.
I adore the escalating crescendo,
the natural ritardando,
the pounding forte,
and the gentle piano,
and even the mezzo, stuck right in the middle.
It's when the silence overwhelms me that the grin slides from my face. Without my shield of music, the insults penetrate and t
PerfectWhy can't I be perfect?
Why can't I get this right?
Am I not good at anything?
This is so stupid, easy, simple.
There are children better able to do this than me.
I miss another note in frustration, and the tears only add to the anger within.
Why can't I get this?
Why won't my fingers cooperate?
My left hand simply cannot fly any faster over the keys, and my right is such a blur that I start to add accidentals where there are none.
This is when I am at my lowest;
when I become disgustingly superficial.
I'm not pretty, I tell myself.
I am ugly and selfish and worthless but...
But if I could only complete this piece,
If I could do something, if I could be perfect for once,
Then I might have value.
These thoughts are cruel, and they embody something that I do not support.
I never think that about others – they are always beautiful to me. They are not me, so therefore they are perfect in every way; they have no inner voice telling them that they will never, ever be anything but....
Dead Man's SwitchIn control, then not -
Sudden loss of grip.
Headlong to where?
Details lost, smudged, streaked.
Careening; no system of
No dead man's switch,
On a fast track -
With or without a god?
Keep in Touch!
Lilyas has dedicated herself to making our community a brighter place with her vibrant artwork and infectious enthusiasm for interacting with others in our community. It has certainly paid off, as many deviants flock to her page on a daily basis to let her know how much of an inspiration she is. We absolutely agree, and couldn't let all that hard work go without recognition, so it's with great pride that we bestow the Deviousness Award for March 2014, to ... Read More